Insert Lame Doctor Pun Here: Phils Blank Yankees Behind Halladay


A little earlier in the spring, I met my quota for making fun of fat people that play for the New York Yankees.  For this post, I believe that mining the fertile vein of Roy Hallady doctor puns may be the best course of action, so here you go.

Today Phillies starter Roy Halladay scrubed in for surgery and operated on the high powered New York Yankees line-up.  “Doc” issued a perscription for outs which was filled for six innings and cured the Yankees of the afflication commonly refered to as scoring runs.

Halladay was matched today by Yankees portly ace Carsten Charles Sabathia who was equally effective in his five innings of work.  Luckily he met his pitch count one inning earlier (or he was enticed into the dugout with a hamburger…..I apologize, old habits die hard) and the Phils offense was given the opportunity to tune up the Yankees bullpen.

Speaking of surgery, the Yankees threw former really good baseball pitcher Mark Prior today.  If you listened really closely, you could still hear Cub fans cursing Dusty Baker for blowing up Prior’s arm.  I don’t really think that “blowing up” is a euphamism in this instance, I actually think Prior’s apendage was seperated from his body with an explosion at some point.  Some of his injury history was bad luck, some of it was bad mechanics and some of it was overuse.  Mostly I just think that the entire Chicago Cubs franchise is cursed.  It is always kind of sad to see a former all-star player clinging to his last chance at redemption.  It makes me less sad that the Yankees have a pitching staff full of these guys.

The Phillies scored seven runs off of the Yankee bullpen to give Halladay a dose of victory.

Positives from today were another John Mayberry Jr. home run giving him three in spring training, Halladay and another strong performance from Ben Francisco (2-4 with an RBI).

Negatives…(Editor’s Note: writer is crying softly into Chase Utley jersey)

Next up the Phils see the Baltimore Orioles again tomorrow at 1:05.