Phillies columnist ragebaits fans with hilarious Cristopher Sánchez 'take'

The Philadelphia Phillies have been on a heater since ending their dreadful first month of the season, and the bulk of the credit goes to their stingy pitching staff. Zack Wheeler and Jesús Luzardo have been fantastic as of late, but one man has been on another planet: Cristopher Sánchez.

The southpaw has been the best pitcher in the sport this year, and the Inquirer’s Mike Sielski trolled Phillies fans by “suggesting” the team should trade him. Haha! Good one.

Sánchez is signed to perhaps the most team-friendly contract in all of baseball, having agreed to a six-year, $107 million pact that runs through the 2032 season (with a team option for 2033) this past winter. The 29-year-old finished second in Cy Young Award voting last season, and has been even better this year, posting a 1.46 ERA across a league-leading 86 ⅓ innings pitched with 103 punchouts.

Don't worry, Cristopher Sánchez is staying right here in Philly

It’s safe to assume Sánchez isn’t going anywhere considering the Phillies are in the midst of their competitive window and he is perhaps the most valuable player on the entire team. The Phils’ offense would be completely lifeless without Bryce Harper or Kyle Schwarber, and the same could be said for the rotation sans Sánchez. Wheeler and Luzardo are excellent hurlers in their own right, but Sánchez is the type of arm that can stifle any offense for nine innings on any given night.

In fact, Sánchez set a franchise record on Wednesday, as he extended his scoreless innings streak to an unreal 50 ⅔ consecutive frames until it came to an end. It's the highest ever scoreless streak for a lefty starter, and it's the third-best ever in the live ball era. Sánchez’s incredible run brought him that close to Orel Hershiser’s all-time record.

All of this has come from a man who was brought into the organization years ago in a barely-covered swap of minor leaguers. Phillies fans may not have many fond memories of former general manager Matt Klentak, but they should be sure to thank him for pulling off the greatest heist in franchise history.

He’s one of the most important pieces on a club with championship aspirations, and his steal of a contract makes him even more valuable to a front office that has mainly built through free agency. This is why fans got so upset at the mere mention of trading the star hurler, even if it's a joke.

And yet, it does tickle demented sick sort of fancy to dream upon what could be acquired for a player of this caliber. The Phillies could command any prospect they wanted if they made Sánchez available.

Sick of the Trea Turner experience? How about league-wide top prospect Jesús Made in a trade with the Milwaukee Brewers? The homeless Athletics need a boatload of pitching to go with their high-powered offense. Leo De Vries anyone? What about a hypothetical swap of pitching for hitting that reels in Yordan Alvarez from the rudderless Houston Astros? The possibilities are endless.

And yet, they’re just that: possibilities. There’s no conceivable reality in which the Phillies pull the trigger on a Sánchez deal. Their championship window is right now and closing fast. No team could offer up a package that puts the Phillies in a better position to win a ring than they're currently in with Sánchez already in the fold.

If the Phillies bottom out at any point over the next few years, then president of baseball operations Dave Dombrowski will have a heck of a decision on his hands of whether or not to cash in his biggest trade asset. But until that happens, everyone should sit back and enjoy the historic ride that is Cristopher Sánchez.

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