Late Night Michael Young Trade Rumor Climbs in Your Window, Licks Your Ear


As you snooze gently in the peaceful confines of your official Phillies iron lung–a medical necessity after the isolated lurches toward painful trades and grim, ungodly anticipation of the past few days of the Phillies at the Winter Meetings–you will sadly be doing so ignorant of what news awaits you come morning.

Mandatory Credit: Kirby Lee/Image of Sport-USA TODAY Sports

Years ago, it was discussed that the Rangers’ Michael Young, their franchise leader in hits, would slip into the Phillies’ third base role.  The Phils were growing weary of weak-hitting injury risks piloting the hot corner, and Young was sick of being simply amazing while relegated to a surplus role.

Anyways, it was decided that Michael Young wasn’t that good and the teams went their separate ways.  A similar sentiment was had years later about another young man from Texas, but that time, there was no water cold enough to turn the notion flaccid.

2012 is a different animal, though, as far as what the Phillies’ needs are.  Instead of a third baseman, we need a third baseman, an out fielder, maybe two, and bullpen help.

After making nothing happen in Nashville other than an afternoon of frantic Justin Upton research, Ruben is reportedly moving in on a trade with the Rangers for Michael Young, who is now thirty god damn six.  The Rangers will eat more than half of his owed $16 million, if this a, you know, thing.  Which may be the most exciting part of the deal.

So if you’re sleeping, consider yourself one of the lucky ones.  These talks are “advanced,” whatever that means, but hopefully it’s before “popping champagne.”