Series 6-Pack: “Fire > Mets baseball.”

In all this Giants-brawling and Nationals-losing-to, it can be hard to maintain focus on our true enemies.

Sure, you may be part of that crowd that thinks it’s shattering the world by saying “You know, I don’t hate the Mets as much as I pity them.”  But the truth is, their ineptitude isn’t going to last forever, and when they’re out there, clowning around again, I’ll be the only grizzled old man screaming at everybody with several decades worth of needless hostility.  “I HATED THE METS BEFORE IT WAS COOL,” I’ll say, being escorted out by confused mall security guards.  In this scenario, I’m watching the game through a front window display.  Forgot to mention that.

Anyways, say hello to Ben Berkon, whose hope in the Mets is defined daily on Rising Apple.

1.  How did Nick Cannon’s attempt to shatter the world record for hugs add to/take away from/get noticed by anything?

It’s a good thing “Molotov Cocktail” night was postponed that game.

2.  Checking in on some Mets news, I saw Terry Collins recently said, “We just can’t stop anybody.”  How do you see the Mets dealing with their bullpen troubles in the offseason, and how much fire does it involve?

The Mets really miss Taylor Buchholz right now. He had a 3.12 ERA, 1.11 WHIP, and 3.71 K/BB before coming down with shoulder fatigue and then depression. Unless the Mets hand the closer job to Parnell in 2012, I could see Alderson signing a guy like Frank Francisco a one-year deal (as opposed to a Heath Bell) and possibly Joel Peralta to setup. I think a bullpen of Francisco/Peralta/Parnell/

Beato/Buchholz/Carrasco/Lefty-

Specialist could be solid.

3.  Sandy Alderson seems primed to stop the “Mike Pelfrey-for-Closer” campaign, even though its not the worst idea in the world.  Is this indicative of a brilliant master plan in the works, currently existing on a giant easel under a sheet in Alderson’s office?

Pelfrey as a closer is just a bad idea. Despite supposedly having five pitches, only one has been effective, his fastball–and at an average of 91.7 MPH, it’s not exactly turning heads. I think his only value is as a starter because at the very least, he can limit walks (2.8 BB/9) and owns a respectable 45.3 GB%.

4.  How much closure will Mets fans get when the Madoff-Mets trial ends?  Any? 

I think the result will just inform Mets fans how soon David Einhorn will become the principle owner.

5.  What sort of effect would Jose Reyes’ return have on the lineup?  What is his future with New York?  What would a Jose Reyes-for-NL MVP campaign have added to the 2011 New York Mets season?  Just tell me everything about Jose Reyes, I guess.

Adding Reyes’ bat to any lineup would do wonders–so for the Mets, it’s no different. In a way, I’m almost glad he got injured again, because it shows other potentially interested teams that signing him to a Carl Crawford-esq deal would be flat-out stupid.

6.  When that fire broke out behind Citi Field, some may have assumed the gates of hell had actually, finally opened in Flushing, and millions of demons were seconds from pouring out to drag the Mets into the underworld.  How noticeable was the relief when it was revealed to just be a good ‘ol fashioned New York construction trailer fire?

I just assumed it was a publicity stunt to have some form of entertainment at Citi Field. Fire > Mets baseball.