Aging, Broken Down Placido Polanco Finds Perfect Fit with Miami Marlins Franchise

"“Former All-Star third baseman Placido Polanco on Thursday signed a one-year contract with the Miami Marlins worth $2.75 million.”–Jayson Stark, ESPN"

“Former All-Star” he called him.

Just… stop grimacing with every movement. Robert Mayer-USA TODAY Sports

Is he saying that because right now, at this moment, Placido Polanco, during rush hour on a Thursday, is not currently an All-Star?  Or does he mean that this once staunch defender and dependable hitter is now an injury risk, looking to log enough innings to get a paycheck?

He was great once, sure.  As recently as 2011, we were voting him to be NL’s starting third baseman in the Midsummer Classic.  But times have changed, age has caught up with him, and there is a reason options were declined this time around.

Polly just isn’t hitting like he used to, or moving like he used to, or staying in the game like he used to.  Too many trots off the field in the middle of an inning while having a hushed exchange with a trainer and the broadcasters try to come up with small talk to put over the silence are becoming part of his repertoire.

Everybody loves Polly, but it was time to go.  Where, you might ask.  Where could be the next home for this gold-gloving, silver-slugging 37-year-old who makes our recent third base acquisition technically labeled as “getting younger” at the position?

Miami, of course.  Where baseball goes to be a nonfactor.

The Marlins are willing pay him $2.75 million for a year of his services, which we all know damn well will not be 100 games.  The Fish tried to make the deal pretty by having installments of $125,000 sweeten the package if he makes it through the centennial, and–fingers crossed–120 games.

It’s part of the Marlins’ new team model, which is to “sign players to play all of the positions that a baseball team requires to still technically be a baseball team.”