"Come ooooonnn... Heeeaalllll...." Christopher Hanewinckel-US PRESSWIRE

Roy Halladay Intimidating Muscles into Functioning Properly Again


Clearwater has seen it’s cross section of Phillies baseball this season.

Back in April, the place was alive with high hopes for the season.  By June, it was drowning in sorrow and also rain water.  By July, it was the receiving end of our broken pieces.  Chase, Ryan, and now Doc have all gone through the Single-A affiliates, causing new excitement for their returns that will eventually turn back into normal misery.

Anyways.  Doc pitched the other day.  He did okay.

Three innings was the prescription, and three innings he hurled, allowing three hits and an unearned Fort Myers Miracle.  The first batter of the game was the only one with whom he reached a three-ball count, and the only one to trot home with a smarmy grin on his face after reaching base on an error.

Now that guy gets to tell his kids he scored on Roy Halladay, when he’s coaching some backwoods little league team ten years from now and everyone but him has forgotten that he even used to be kind of a ballplayer.  Congratulations.

It was Doc’s first start since straining his back muscle, and it seems to be the only one he feels he needs.  Which is the least surprising news to come out of this story.  The Phillies seem to agree, having come to accept Doc’s god-like healing powers, and everyone’s pretty jacked about bringing him back for the Dodgers series during which his spot in the rotation would next come.

Is three innings of Single-A ball enough for Doc to know he’s healthy?  It honestly can’t be.  I’m no baseball expert, but the guy has a pretty strong argument for being the most important player on the team, so it would pay to be a bit cautious, especially if the Phillies are having a year where they are the same crappy team with or without Roy Halladay.

Seriously how does that work?

Of course, if the Phillies are plotting a run in the second half, then now is when they need Doc more than ever.  See what I did there?  You thought I was forming an opinion on the matter, but then I also said the opposite thing was true?  That’s a little trick I picked up.  Now I can’t be wrong, ever.  Internet!

But it’s true.  The Phillies second half run starts now, and it will probably go better with Roy Halladay around.  The likelihood of it being a success story is minimal, but there’s a certain comfort in knowing all the right players are in there.  What I mean is, there’s a certain comfort in knowing Ty Wigginton is not on the baseball field.  Or Kyle Kendrick.

Tags: Roy Halladay