Jeremy Accardo is Next Reliever Being Possibly Considered, Maybe

While the Reds are sitting around admiring their shiny new bullpen with a Ryan Madson at the end of it, the Phillies prefer to assemble the largest group of elite, elderly relief pitchers looking for a few detours before retirement comes in the form of a paragraph-long article on the back page of their hometown sports section and a head coaching job at a high school.

Dave Bush, with the power of consecutive home run surrendering!

Scott Elarton, with the power of consistent success against Vladimir Guerrero!

Pat Misch, with the power of watching Barry Bonds break records!

And not to mention… several others!

But the latest possible addition to the League of Pretty Ordinary Gentlemen is Jeremy Accardo, ex-Blue Jay and ex-Oriole, who at 30 has firmly left his best years behind him.  You’ve got to assume the Phillies see his 2011 ERA of 5.73 and think, “Now there’s a veteran pitcher who could provide gruff, but likable guidance to a young pitcher,” rather than assuming he will be largely effective in any way.

However, I’m just looking at the numbers.  Maybe Accardo possesses a little something called “heart,” the same thing that keeps Jamie Moyer swearing he’ll play again and the same thing that kept Dennis Quaid alive all throughout The Rookie.  That thing is also known as “insanity.”  Sometimes it happens to people.

Anyways, do the Phillies sign the 30-year-old righthander?  The hell should I know?  Probably not.