NL East Infection: OMGGGG
By Justin Klugh
The Marlins have hurled themselves onto the dock and begun flopping about and gasping for air, in an attempt to get everybody’s attention. Fortunately, the internet exists, so all the things they’re doing have somewhere to be discussed rationally. But I believe Hanley Ramirez sums it up best.
"“OMGGGG…”–Hanley Ramirez, grown-ass man"
- They signed Heath Bell to be chief instigator and pitch sometimes I guess. Bell hit the ground running, striking a nerve with Phillies fans upon stating that he thinks the Marlins, the team he now plays for, “can beat” the Phillies, their chief competitors for the division. But none of that really matters, now that every team makes the playoffs.
- For a while there, Albert Pujols was going to be a Marlin, but he seems to be under control now. Which is really too bad, because I was going to use this “Miami teams each have a Big 3” parallel I came up with after five seconds on the internet.
- Jose Reyes plays for the Marlins now, and you can tell they’re serious by the way they gave him a jersey and stuff.
- Hanley Ramirez is, as always, just happy to be alive.
New York Mets
As little as they seem to move, the Mets are in fact entangled in some Hot Stove things. First, they woke up and found a good-bye note from Jose Reyes on the fridge. Then, they peaked out the window and saw a few teams lining up to ask about Jon Niese. Now, they’ve had their coffee and watched some cartoons and cleared their head enough to start making deals.
So they traded Angel Pagan to the Giants, reigniting the intense friendship he’s always had with Carlos Beltran, who you’ll remember as the guy whose offensive prowess took the San Francisco Giants to the 2011 World Series. Or at least, they’ll get to pass each other as they head in and our of town. The Mets get Andre Torres! And Ramon Ramirez.
They also did some other stuff, but what’s most important about the Mets right now is that they are a perfect comparison for the world’s economy, which a lot of people will tell you is “OMFG terrible.”
Atlanta Braves
Atlanta Journal-Constitution Braves beat writer David O’Brien radioed in from the Winter Meetings today, and could do little more than give an exasperated shrug at the camera. He also looked exhausted.
“We’re not going to make a deal just to make a deal,” said GM Frank Wren, proving once and for all that he’s got this general managing thing down cold.
Washington Nationals
The Nationals were the Marlins of 2010. They were making moves and elbowing their way into headlines more than ever before. They wanted to be noticed. They wanted attention. They opened their wallet, pulled out a wad of bills, and started slapping us all across the cheeks with it.
Now, though, the Marlins are the Marlins 0f 2011. And the Nationals are old news. Just ask their GM Mike Rizzo, whose recent failures were chronicled across the headlines of the Washington Post.
22 1/2 hours later:
The important thing is that Mark Buehrle got to feel wanted.