Why You Should Despise the Nationals


So here is the deal: The Washington Nationals are incredibly easy to dislike.

Bryce Harper: The Face Hole of the Washington Nationals (Credit: GQ Magazine)

They sucked themselves into two can’t miss prospects in Steven Strasburg and Bryce Harper, who happens to be total douche in his own right.  Their front office is now praised as geniuses because their consistent awfulness forced them to draft in the top 10 for decades.  Their stadium is a concrete monstrosity. They have no actual fans. No one is a Nationals fan. My friend lives in D.C. and that is what he tells me. I am just going to take his word for it.  You should too.

Also, they once produced this cringe worthy video of a guy who looks like Super Mario touting Wil Nieves.  As you watch, remember that Wil Nieves has SEVEN career home runs and is generally awful.

Then there was that time they wouldn’t let people who lived near Philadelphia to buy tickets to their games.  That was a real thing at one point in their illustrious history.

The Nationals were picked by, what felt like, every expert to win the NL East.  Bunch of those rum heads also picked them to win the World Series. Headed into this weekend the media darlings are 24-23 and have scored EIGHT less runs than the Phillies. Have you watched the Phillies offense this year? It has been painful.  The Nationals have been worse than that.

Sweep these assholes.