Mark Parent Leaves Tear-Stained Farewell Note in Reading

There are few jobs that ask more from a man than Bench Coach for the Chicago White Sox.  One must have the patience of a saint, the experience of a veteran, and the wrangling ability of a ringmaster for a circus that specializes in only furious animals.

Oh, that’s right.  Ozzie Guillen doesn’t work there anymore.

Mark Parent, whose most recent coaching efforts took our Reading Phillies to the Eastern League playoff this season, and then almost immediately out of them again, is being headhunted by the White Sox as they attempt to fill out new manager Robin Ventura’s staff.  And why not turn to our farm system?  It’s pretty much void of players at this point anyway.  Let’s start trading the coaches, too!  Hell, why not rent out First Energy Field to the Yankees?  Let ‘um hang up pictures of Derek Jeter everywhere and maybe rename Reading, PA “YES Network Live!”

I’d like to apologize for that last paragraph.  There are plenty of players in the Phillies farm system, and not only are they talented, but they will often talk to you on Twitter, as long as you aren’t a raving dick.

I’m just saying that if Mark Parent wants to go hang out with Robin Ventura for the rest of his life, then fine.  No bitterness or hard feelings on our end.  Sure, this is something we’ve built together and maybe it is just minor league baseball, but come on.  Have you seen the White Sox lately?  And wasn’t A.J. Pierzynski just voted Worst Guy Ever by his fellow MLB players?

Sounds like a nice place to work.

Oh well.  At least we still have you in Triple-A, Ryne Sandberg.

"“The source added that Ryne Sandberg, who managed at Triple-A Lehigh Valley, also would make a good candidate.”–Mark Gonzales, Chicago Tribune"

GAAAAAAAAAAHHH