Phils Ride Schneider to Win
By Editorial Staff
Chase Utley. It seems that he is everywhere and not in a good 80’s Micheal Jackson sort of way, but more in a Lotoya Jackson naked pictures sort of way (I am not entirely sure what I meant here, but I know that I don’t like thinking of Lotoya Jackson naked, or Chase Utley being injured). That is the double edge sword of having good players on the baseball team that you like.
If they exist, there is a possibility that they can be taken from you by injury. You know that no one would give a shit if the Phillies were a team full of Desi Relafords and had no realistic shot to be anything more than mediocre. That being said, this team is not mediocre and part of the fabric that makes this statement a reality is how good the second baseman is at baseball. This starts an argument concerning a similar notion to “it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.” Tennyson quotes aside, I just want the Phillies to enter the season intact.
The Phillies had a spring training game against the Detroit Tigers today. Chase Utley was not involved in said contest. He was talked about before and after the game and there were several mentions of his cranky knee during the broadcast. I am not sure if I am the first to say this, but, “I HATE YOU CHASE ULTEY’S KNEE!!!” Chase seems like the kind of guy who would rub dirt on a broken leg and stay in the game. Why are these “overuse” injuries popping up? Why are there more weird things that I have never heard of occurring more frequently by the day? Luckily, the treatment options are pretty much the same for all of these stupid sounding problems; rest and therepy. Rest assured that the Phillies handsome second baseman will be making you look ugly in front of your wife in no time.
What the hell was I talking about? That’s right; Tigers versus Phillies. Third year pitcher Rick Porcello took the hill for the Tigers and was opposed by Joe Blanton. Since everything in the Phillies universe is based loosely on Chase Utley, I think we are all hoping that Blanton can pitch well enough to get the Phils a good second baseman when Chase’s knee condition worsens and kills him by the start of the regular season.
Joe allowed two runs in five innings of work today and is putting together an above average spring. The Phils staked Blanton to a 4-0 lead in the top of the second following a three run home run by Brian Schneider and an RBI single from Ross Gload.
The Phils went on to a 5-3 win after an insurance homer from former Tiger Jeff Larish.
I know that Chase’s knee hurts, but let try to calm down and enjoy the amount of talent on this baseball team. I know that his knee is a bastard that is trying to steal our 140+ win season, but it is still very early. Here’s to hoping that there is enough time for Chase to return to 100%. “And out of darkness came the hands that reach thro’ nature, moulding men.” Tennyson seems to think that the Phils will use this injury as a sort of characher building exercise and imerge from the “darkness” sronger. Sounds good.
Next up Hallady will make up all feel better by starting against the Yankees tomorrow at 1:05.