Rory McIlroy Is So Philadelphia
By Alex Christy
Earlier in the week Rory McIlroy did some weird PR stunt where he ran up the art museum steps in a Phillies jersey.
See! There is a famous golfer doing a real Philadelphia thing! He is likable enough if you are a fan of golf, I guess. Few celebrities ever put on Phillies gear. Typically they wear Yankees hats. I can only assume this is because they all hail from New York City.
Rory isn’t the first guy to use the Phillies brand to help promote his own. Here is a list of some others. Granted some of these people are actual Philadelphia sports fans, but I don’t care.
Will Smith
I can’t be sure, but Will Smith might be the only famous person to ever come from Philadelphia. He owns like 1/100th of one percent of the Sixers too! For the past eight years he has been teasing putting out another rap album by singing snippets of his hit songs on late night talk shows. Ruben Amaro must be taking notes as he has been teasing about making this team competitive, but he still pimps out Delmon Young.
Ryan Phillipe
Outside of Will Smith, this is about as Hollywood elite as it gets. Phillipe was in Cruel Intentions. The only thing I can remember about that movie is the lesbian kiss between Sarah Michelle Gellar and some other girl. I think Phillipe’s character did coke too. Most recently he was in Straight A’s. I never saw it nor do I want to see it. Pretty sure it would give me straight z’s, amirite?!
Plaxico Burress
Plaxico wore this hat when he got out of jail. I guess that’s the joke?
Vice President Joe Biden
Joe Biden once told a guy who can’t walk to stand up. The Yankees can have Jay-Z. The Cubs can have Bill Murray. I’ll take the guy who makes frequent public gaffs and whose position is always portrayed as marginalized in every political movie and television show I have ever seen.
This list isn’t exhaustive. The truth is, I just got exhausted writing it. Other notable actual Philadelphia fans include Tina Fey and Bradley Cooper. I have a bunch of laundry to do and want to eat Cheez Its, so I stopped. I wonder if they have ever run up the art museum steps. They probably have because they have people that do their laundry and eat their junk food for them.