Chan Ho Park Celebrates Holidays by Demanding Money from Former Victim of Hat Theft

I don’t know if Chan Ho Park went home and got bitch-slapped by his wife, or suffered one too many Shane Victorino-fueled wedgies in the Phils’ locker room this past season, or realized handing a briefcase full of money to a guy who once chased a fan into the stands for stealing his hat was not the best financial venture, but he is a changed man.  I think; I can’t say I knew him personally before now.  But we are getting a better look at what his true nature is

BECAUSE HE IS CHAN HO PARK AND HE IS A MAN DAMN IT.

Let’s put aside the weeks-long temper tantrum he’s been throwing about becoming a starting pitcher (The Phillies:  “No.”)  Now, he’s taking a trip down memory lane to get all “Where’s my money?!” on ex-pro catcher Chad Kreuter.

Kreuter is a former Dodger teammate of Park’s from 2000-01 and now coaches at the University of Southern California.  Coaches baseball, not… money-laundering.  Obviously.

Anyways, he apparently borrowed $460,000 from Park at some point, said he’d pay it back in a year, didn’t, and is now suffering the consequences of effing with Park during what is apparently a time in his life when is not to be trifled with.

Why did he borrow the money?  Why from Park?  WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?!

Let’s go to the comments section for some intriguing fan commentary:

“NO MATTER WHERE MR. PARK PLAYS NEXT SEASON THE PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES WILL BE THE 2010 WORLD CHAMPIONS! I HAVE BEEN A PHILLIES FAN FOR 50 YEARS!”

…

Wow.

But why even talk about this when the Phillies aren’t not not signing a relief pitcher, maybe?

The MacDougal or Baez process is going to be about watching and waiting.  I’m going to say that they are close to equal caliber closers, both capable of backing up the ass-end of the bullpen.  I’m just relieved we’re apparently in talks with some relief pitchers.

Hopefully, not far into the future we will be reporting on more “Phillies sign talented relievers” stories, but until then… hat thievery for everyone!   Ha-ha!