That Balls Outta Here » wilson valdez

Wilson Valdez Loses Battle with Not Being Traded to the Reds

Justin Klugh — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 15:00:49 +0000

For weeks now, you’ve been following the Wilson Valdez trade rumors. Unfortunately, at the moment they hit a fever pitch, they were overlooked, thanks to pointless media-spew like Prince Fielder’s deal with the Tigers or the State of the Union Address. Oh, an elite hitter is getting paid an asinine amount of money? Oh, America is still a country? These aren’t points that could have been made in five minutes tops?

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Jimmy Rollins Refuses to Provide Us Every F*cking Injury Detail We Want

Justin Klugh — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 16:00:05 +0000

Wilson Valdez celebrated his return to the Phillies lineup yesterday in place of “injured” Jimmy Rollins by doing what he does best with a bat: ruining everything.

So naturally, the press corps turned their attention toward demanding answers from Jimmy Rollins, whose limps in the clubhouse were apparently so well-rehearsed, none of the reporters could figure out if he was faking it or not.

After fouling a ball off his knee, Jimmy described the pain as bad enough to have him begging for the ball not to be hit to him by the third inning, which any doctor will tell you is excellent news for a player who everyone wants to keep playing. (more…)

Danys Baez, David Herndon and Wilson Valdez Star in 19 Inning Win

Thu, 26 May 2011 12:54:33 +0000

Huh?! What the hell just happened.? I think what happened was that I stayed up until 2:00 A.M. ON A SCHOOL NIGHT watching a baseball game last over five hours. The combination of terrible pitchers David Herndon and Danys Baez combined to throw seven (not a typo, I actually meant seven) and 1/3 innings of one-hit relief and a back up second baseman who had not pitched in a game in this country pitched the nineteenth inning. (more…)