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Phillies Demand Death Match to Decide Final Bullpen Spot
The Phillies have told us there is only one bullpen spot available, and given the morose way in which Michael Stutes and Vance Worley were cleaning out their lockers the other day, it’s come down…Read More
So This Luis Castillo Thing is Moving Right Along
I was walking down the street this past weekend when I blacked out in the middle of a busy intersection. “The New York Mets released Castillo on Friday and the Phillies immediately expressed interest.” –Todd…Read More
New Terrible Rumor Has Luis Castillo Coming to Phils
I used to live in farm country. Stepping outside in the summer time meant the stench of fresh fertilizer being smeared across the landscape. When you’re a kid, the smell reminds you of being…Read More
Lee Hit Hard in Phillies Loss, People Begin to Freak Out
There are those in the Delaware valley that have come to the determination that the baseball gods are angry with the Philadelphia Phillies. Their stud second baseman, closer, third baseman and number…Read More
The Key to Improving Danys Baez is “Hope”
Say hello to Danys Baez. Or say one of the other things you normally say to him, like “Get this guy out or I will punch my girlfriend’s cat across the room,” and “Great, now I…Read More
And more..
Michael Stutes is New Guy Who is Inspiration to Watch
When you’re surrounded by old people, it makes sense to panic. What if they die? What if they…Read More
Bill Hall Has Big Plans to Shout at Cole Hamels Later
Spring Training games are usually emotionless contests, void of the pressures and passion that make regular…Read More
Who Knows What Brad Lidge’s “Bicep Soreness” Actually Is
So we discovered several days back that Ruben is celebrating his new deal with a healthy dosage of secrets…Read More
Jamie Moyer Hates the Idea of Baseball Without Him
If you thought phrases like “retirement,” “prime,” or “If you go out there,…Read More
Phillies Forecast Showing Four More Years of Smug
As near as we can tell, “Philadelphia Phillies GM” was a job filled by a seal wearing a clown…Read More
Phillies Tired of Stringing Cut Players Along
“Sarcastic laughter” is hard to disseminate via internet, but I’m pretty sure Justin…Read More
A Drunk Dial from Dom Brown’s Old Batting Stance
Hey, you’ve reached That Balls Outta Here. We inexplicably use an old school answering machine…Read More
Your Daily Horrible News About Chase Utley
Morning routines are fun! -Wake up -Shake last remnants of night terrors out of head -Turn on Sportscenter -See…Read More
Chase Utley and Domonic Brown Soon to be Surgery Buddies
Does it even count as “baseball” if Chase Utley isn’t playing it? No. The answer…Read More
A Quick Update on Unpopular Phillies
Delwyn Young came to us with rave reviews from every team he’s played for. What they were raving…Read More
Dom Brown Saga Takes Hand-Breakingly Bad Turn
“So Dom Brown broke his hand,” someone told me at a party last night. I go to a lot of…Read More
Rich Dubee Looks Forward to Future of Humiliating Own Son
“If he ever gets there and pitches against us, I hope we light him up.” –Rich Dubee Life…Read More
Some Unfortunate Person Has Stolen J.C. Romero’s Car
If there was one Phillie to not steal a car from, it’s probably the one that’s been suspended…Read More
Chase Utley For Some Reason Not Healed Immediately
Ruben is telling us that he’s no going to so sorting through the scrap heap or leaving seductive…Read More
Shane Victorino Answers Question by Winking
Why is Shane Victorino bunting? Why hasn’t he bunted so much before? Why would he try to bunt…Read More
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