Spring Training

Latest Updates

Phillies Demand Death Match to Decide Final Bullpen Spot

The Phillies have told us there is only one bullpen spot available, and given the morose way in which Michael Stutes and Vance Worley were cleaning out their lockers the other day, it’s come down…Read More

So This Luis Castillo Thing is Moving Right Along

I was walking down the street this past weekend when I blacked out in the middle of a busy intersection. “The New York Mets released Castillo on Friday and the Phillies immediately expressed interest.” –Todd…Read More

New Terrible Rumor Has Luis Castillo Coming to Phils

I used to live in farm country.  Stepping outside in the summer time meant the stench of fresh fertilizer being smeared across the landscape.  When you’re a kid, the smell reminds you of being…Read More

Lee Hit Hard in Phillies Loss, People Begin to Freak Out

There are those in the Delaware valley that have come to the determination that the baseball gods are angry with the Philadelphia Phillies.  Their stud second baseman, closer, third baseman and number…Read More

The Key to Improving Danys Baez is “Hope”

Say hello to Danys Baez.  Or say one of the other things you normally say to him, like “Get this guy out or I will punch my girlfriend’s cat across the room,” and “Great, now I…Read More

And more..

Michael Stutes is New Guy Who is Inspiration to Watch

When you’re surrounded by old people, it makes sense to panic.  What if they die?  What if they…Read More

Bill Hall Has Big Plans to Shout at Cole Hamels Later

Spring Training games are usually emotionless contests, void of the pressures and passion that make regular…Read More

Who Knows What Brad Lidge’s “Bicep Soreness” Actually Is

So we discovered several days back that Ruben is celebrating his new deal with a healthy dosage of secrets…Read More

Jamie Moyer Hates the Idea of Baseball Without Him

If you thought phrases like “retirement,” “prime,” or “If you go out there,…Read More

Phillies Forecast Showing Four More Years of Smug

As near as we can tell, “Philadelphia Phillies GM” was a job filled by a seal wearing a clown…Read More

Phillies Tired of Stringing Cut Players Along

“Sarcastic laughter” is hard to disseminate via internet, but I’m pretty sure Justin…Read More

A Drunk Dial from Dom Brown’s Old Batting Stance

Hey, you’ve reached That Balls Outta Here.  We inexplicably use an old school answering machine…Read More

Your Daily Horrible News About Chase Utley

Morning routines are fun! -Wake up -Shake last remnants of night terrors out of head -Turn on Sportscenter -See…Read More

Chase Utley and Domonic Brown Soon to be Surgery Buddies

Does it even count as “baseball” if Chase Utley isn’t playing it?  No.  The answer…Read More

A Quick Update on Unpopular Phillies

Delwyn Young came to us with rave reviews from every team he’s played for.  What they were raving…Read More

Dom Brown Saga Takes Hand-Breakingly Bad Turn

“So Dom Brown broke his hand,” someone told me at a party last night.  I go to a lot of…Read More

Rich Dubee Looks Forward to Future of Humiliating Own Son

“If he ever gets there and pitches against us, I hope we light him up.” –Rich Dubee Life…Read More

Some Unfortunate Person Has Stolen J.C. Romero’s Car

If there was one Phillie to not steal a car from, it’s probably the one that’s been suspended…Read More

Chase Utley For Some Reason Not Healed Immediately

Ruben is telling us that he’s no going to so sorting through the scrap heap or leaving seductive…Read More

Shane Victorino Answers Question by Winking

Why is Shane Victorino bunting?  Why hasn’t he bunted so much before?  Why would he try to bunt…Read More