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Phillies Turn to Captain Hugs and the Ass Hammer for Hitting Guidance
Candidates for coaching job are Mike Sweeney and Matt Stairs; not anti-abstinence crime fighting duo Pete MacKanin was recently fired by the Phillies, leaving a vacancy in their ‘bench coach’…Read More
In Surprise News, Everyone Thinks Roy Halladay is Awesome
They worried about his playoff experience, so he threw a no-hitter. The Phillies were in mid-trainwreck, so he threw a perfect game. He threw more innings, faced more batters, and won more games than…Read More
Unable to Stop Astros, Phils Beat Padres for Some Reason
There are a lot of words floating around to describe the Phillies right now. ”Lifeless.” ”Inexplicable.” ”Talented.” Basically the team’s potential does…Read More
Mike Sweeney Starts, Finishes Hilarious Mets Slaughter
Everybody comes to Philly and has their eyes open. Guys have been snatched in early August for the last few years who’ve graduated from places like Baltimore or Seattle, where the post season hides…Read More
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