Jose Contreras Not Just Injury-Related Headline Anymore
After what felt like a career’s worth of promising that Jose Contreras was a real person, and not just another name trapped forever on the Disabled List, the Phillies welcome back late-inning reliever…Read More
Dom Brown Starts Off Preseason With Resounding Statement to Jose Contreras
We seem to have our first simmering player rivalry boiling over into a full fledged attack. We don’t know what started it. We don’t know who started it. What we do know, however, is that…Read More
Pete Orr’s Canadian Heritage Not Enough to Keep him on Phillies
Do you like Pete Orr? You probably do. He’s one of the few unhateable people walking the earth. But this is offseason baseball, when we don’t have a keen slide or a quirky smile to distract…Read More
No One Notices All Phillies Injuries Because of How Awesome Phillies Are
For everybody whose written the words “The Phillies aren’t a World Series lock!!!” there is no greater validation than a series of horrific/stupid injuries. And at the cue of the gunshot…Read More
Jose Contreras Attempts Transformation Into Superhero
Phillies reliever Jose Contreras received a platelet-rich plasma injection to help alleviate pain in his right throwing arm. –Todd Zolecki As comic books have taught us, this will end well. INT.…Read More
Analysis of Ryan Madson’s Injury by a Furious Old Man
I’ve had hundreds of hand contusions in my day and only seven of them weren’t because I…Read More
Jose Contreras is Also Now Dead
Jose Contreras and his strained flexor pronator tendon in his right elbow are joining Brad Lidge in closer-heaven. In…Read More
Hamels and Polanco Lead Phils to Victory Over Fish
Every baseball team on the east coast makes a yearly pilgrimage to the warm shores of Florida to escape…Read More
Blanton Sloppy in Phillies Win
Joe Blanton looked better than any of the Phillies pitchers not named Halladay this spring. Any person…Read More
In Unprecedented Move, Phillies Continue Assigning Roles to Players
Jose Contreras will be closing instead of Brad Lidge, who can’t be bothered to be available on…Read More
Phillies Think It’s Probably About Time You Learned How to Cook
Sure, this time of year is responsible for the majority of your dark thoughts. Seeing George Bailey…Read More
Furious Gathering of Bullpen Help Continues Exploding
Clearly, Ruben Amaro has speed, rather than endurance, at the forefront of this off season’s signings. …Read More
Ryne Sandberg Now Officially Back on Phillies Payroll; Jose Contreras Not
You can’t help but feel like we’re watching baseball’s longest running joke chug along…Read More
Ruben Amaro Starts Feeding Jose Contreras all the Leftover Werth
The free agents are shuffling, and this time, we’ve gone from “Everyone seems to be at least…Read More
Phillies Off Season to be Rich in “Werth/Worth” Puns
“Over the next 48 hours or so, we’ll make contact,” Ruben Amaro said, not reaching out to a…Read More
Some Weekend Ryan Madson Love For You
Sean Hagan, or The Red Suit, as he’s known on the masked vigilante circuit, finally got his punishment:…Read More
Charlie Manuel Confused, Enraged by Ryan Madson Quirkiness
“I’ve been wearing it every day to the playoffs, so I had to wear it again today,” Madson said…Read More
Phillies Lose in Marlins Walkoff; Win Game
I was watching tonight’s game on a cell phone, and I cannot recommend a worse way to view the Phillies…Read More
Discussing a Phils Loss After Discovering I Did Not Get A Job
EDITOR’S NOTE: Lead Writer Justin Klugh found out this morning the interesting, sexy internship…Read More
Phillies Finish Game With More Runs Than Opposing Team
Holy crap, its Christmas morning. Read | Share








