He’s everywhere these days!  Everywhere in Reading, PA, which means he is the king of trains and, like, that big pagoda that’s there for some reason.  He can hit, he can field, and he can stay in Double-A, while every other NL East team who isn’t in the midst of a personal Armageddon is birthing a young phenom.

Mike Stanton, Jason Heyward, Ike Davis, Stephen Strasburg.  Each a special talent, each a possible savior, each playing for a shit-eating NL rival currently slathering up to slip on by the Phillies.  Heyward hits home runs into outer space. Mike Stanton, concealed by Strasburg’s debut, can bring the gasping Marlins back from the edge, Ike Davis keeps falling over railings, and Strasburg… god, just… leave us alone…

So, with us spiraling in every direction, spewing failure-juice all over the league, it makes sense that the masses call for the one thing we don’t seem to have–that everyone else does.

The prospect.  But can one man really turn around an entire team flailing desperately in the wind? Can a single entity strike fear into hearts of our competitors? CAN ONE READING PHILLIE BRING AN UNWAVERING ASSAULT ON THE PITCHING SO HEARTILY STIFLING KNOWN PROFESSIONALS?!

(more…)

“WE COULD TAKE BOTH OF THEM AT ONCE BRING IT ON.”

Ha-ha, calm down there.  We’re talking about a couple of championship squads.  The Angels are fueled by the ghost of a teammate who died tragically, while the Yankees just need more championship rings to feed the demon living in George Steinbrenner’s basement.

Sure, I gave the finger to the television applauded politely when the Yankees couldn’t get their shit together on Thursday.  But I can’t concede that the Angels are a favorable opponent either, so what it comes down to is that I am more interested in watching the Yankees lose than the Angels win.

I’m sure I’m not alone.

But there’s that whole “beat the best” argument Roommate keeps bringing up.  Then again, I think he’s just upset because had to watch two hours of Cops tonight.

The Yankees are insane.  Now that A-Rod is a postseason production horse, their already stacked lineup has some extra fire to it.  The descriptions in both league championship series’s of the Phillies and Yankees rosters were disturbingly similar; how both were full of offensive weapons, neither really had a hole (Especially with Carlos Ruiz exploding on our end with a .346 batting average, 9 H, 1 HR and a stolen base?!  How does a guy nicknamed ‘Chooch’ have a stolen base?!  Awesome).

But I know we would edge them out on “Which manager has a better laugh.”

GUFFAW GUFFAW GUFFAW

The Angels clearly don’t have a comparable lineup offensively, which makes the comeback wins they’ve got on their record all the more incredible.  There’s only two starters with a .300+ BA, as opposed to the Yankees’ four (same as the Phils).

But the Angels’ are primed to run you over with their speed:  7 SB in the postseason, and only caught twice, while the Yankees are floundering a lousy 3 SB/3 CS record.  John Lackey and Jerred Weaver ain’t slouches, neither.

We’re looking at pitchers capable of stellar shutdowns on all counts, but who cares?

The Yankee’s postseason stat page on ESPN.com paints a pretty grim picture:  Four Alex Rodriguez’s, smiling back at you, all proud of their newfound playoff offense.

You don’t want to give the Angels zero chance, but if they were to pull this off, clearly it would earn the “upset” title.

No matter what, the longer the Angels scratch and claw to life, the more and more the Phillies need to keep from losing momentum.  Whoever comes out of this ALCS is going to be tired, but charged to play.  The Phillies will be coming off a few off days and are hopefully staying focused, charting an attack, and wearing their galoshes.

All we can do is wait.  And keep guffawing.