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Late for Work Link Dump
True Phillies fandom refuses to allow itself to be rained upon, except if it is actual rain, in which case, Phillies fandom runs inside and hides like a little bitch. Today, more than ever, we need our…Read More
Braves Finally Find Way to Sneak Into Playoffs
I once interned at a TV station and, after reminding one of the editors it was my last day, they held an impromptu ceremony where five staffers–four of which knew who I was!–gathered in a circle…Read More
Phils Win in Walkoff Thanks to Child Witch Doctor
Heroes aren’t everywhere. If they were, the crack alley leading up to my apartment would be crime and possibly feces-free. The walls of garbage on Broad Street slapping street-walkers on a windy…Read More
Phillies Lose in Marlins Walkoff; Win Game
I was watching tonight’s game on a cell phone, and I cannot recommend a worse way to view the Phillies bullpen getting tail-slapped by a resurgence of bored Marlins. “Oh, good, its 4-2,”…Read More
Ha, Ha… Damn: Roy Oswalt’s Phillies Debut
OMFG ROY OSWALT (6 IP, 4 ER, 7 H) IS TERRIBLE DID YOU SEE HIM SWEARING OUT THERE ON THE MOUND SH!T SH!T SH!T. Read | Share
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Phillies Continue Hot Streak of Wins, Stupid Injuries
Even a win can feel like a loss. Jimmy Rollins went down yesterday with a bad case of “foul ball…Read More
Cole Hamels Gives Everything; Gets Nothing as Phils Win
Cole Hamels threw a one-hit shut out, facing only on batter more than the minimum in eight innings of…Read More
Phils Ninth Inning Rally Sponsored by Cubs’ Defense
When I got to college for the first time to begin the sick experiment of living on my own, there was…Read More
Series Sweep Not Ruined by Nervous Old People
Lidge popped up Miguel Cairo, Jayson made the snare, and the Phillies swept the Reds in four games to…Read More
Brian Schneider Walkoff Ends Night of Insanity; Fan Abuse
“Get out of the fucking way!” Jayson Werth screamed at the father and young son. 1. No,…Read More
Phillies Win, Despite Ejections; Nature
I walked into 30th Street Station and masses of people were clogging any and all thoroughfares. The once…Read More
Jamie Moyer Stops Yankees With Bare Hands
Brad Lidge walked out of the bullpen with rehabilitation in his elbow and four runs in his back pocket.…Read More
Phillies Mistake Tim Wakefield For Guy From That Shut Out That One Time
You have to walk down a crack alley to get to my front door. There’s a gate separating us from…Read More
Phillies Celebrate 7th Shut Out of Season With Downtrodden Facial Expressions
I don’t read a ton of baseball books, but I remember carrying around Cal Ripken’s “The…Read More
Jesse Biddle Shaken After Assault From Win-Starved Phanatic
For awhile, Philly was spoiled by a harmonic blast of sunshine. Roadkill boiled in the mid-afternoon…Read More
Dallas Green Gives Not Profanity-Laced Advice on Having Patience
Does the New York Post go out of its way to make the Mets look like a frolicking gaggle of pre-pubescent,…Read More
Charlie Manuel Imagines World Where Phillies Always Win
This is the shit legends are made of. Not our legend, mind you, but the legends in some other city, on…Read More
Bizarro-Phils Continue Reverse-Sweep of Mets
Shane Victorino is my favorite player. I don’t know how many quasi/full on-stalking jokes I need…Read More
Roy Halladay Throws 53rd Career Complete Game as Flyers Win 3-0
May 18, 2010. Citizens Bank Park. The pitcher’s mound. 9:07 pm. Charlie Manuel trotted out…Read More
Phillies Somehow Not Arrested for Disturbing Murder of Pirates
The rain was threatening all day in Philly, but it wasn’t until later that it dumped all over us, splashing sewage…Read More
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