Roy Halladay Goes Six, Shrieks at Umpire

It was a cra cra cra crazy night in Jersey, with Roy Halladay appearing in a BlueClaws uniform and one umpire probably swearing off umpiring forever.

Halladay made his second rehab start in Lakewood, throwing six innings at the Hagerstown Suns, featuring seven hits, one earned run, three walks and four strikeouts.  Reports indicated his velocity and control were elusive and also the radar gun was broken for a while but he seemed to be hitting 87-89 mph, tops.

Then there was a play at the plate that he was really emotionally invested in.

So Ben Levin was exploded by Doc’s pulsating mind and they played the rest of the game in horrible silence, with Halladay throwing a pitch and demanding the ball back from his sobbing young catcher, who was covered in ump-guts and screaming “I JUST WANNA GO HOME…”

Doc threw 52/90 for strikes, claiming his cutter got somewhere he liked by the fourth inning and he found it “easier to get loose.”  As far as his immediate future on the big league level, he deferred to the front office, an entity known for its pinpoint decision-making skills.

Following the game, Doc took our fantasies about him coming back to throw a no-hitter before the end of the season and giving everyone the chance to cheer for something other than less parking lot traffic and tapered them down into almost nothing.

The good news?  Well, somebody named Lee Ridenhour came in after Doc and threw three scoreless relief innings, striking out three and allowing only two hits.  I know somebody whose going to be a disappointing option in the Major League bullpen someday if he keeps this up!

No, not you, Halladay.  I didn’t mean you.  Please don’t… explode me with your brain.