Dodgers Break Kyle Kendrick

“I have a headache,” Kyle Kendrick said.

June 30, 2013; Los Angeles, CA, USA; Philadelphia Phillies starting pitcher Kyle Kendrick (38) pitches during the first inning against the Los Angeles Dodgers at Dodger Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Gary A. Vasquez-USA TODAY Sports

We all have headaches, Kyle.  They’re called “the Phillies.”  Of course, the Phillies aren’t going 86 mph toward the back of Kyle’s skull.  So his headache may be a tad more pressing.

Kyle has a mild concussion, the latest freak injury to victimize this pitching staff.  He was in the middle of a poor series finale in Los Angeles on Sunday, batting in the sixth inning, when a Stephen Fife offering clipped him in the back of the head, putting him on the ground.

Doctors determined that there was nothing seriously wrong with Kyle – other than the baseball that was thrown at his head – and he stayed with the team, traveling with them to Pittsburgh.  Today, he will be “evaluated” after the Phillies’ boots are on the ground, and has said that if nothing’s wrong, he won’t even miss a start.

But should a doctor look at a cat scan of Kyle’s head and see a spider in his ear or something, we’d get to see who from a pool of considerably low talent the Phillies bring in to replace him.  Tyler Cloyd?  Guy’s ERA is older than most fourth graders.  Carlos Zambrano?  Shoulder soreness.  Ethan Martin?  Whatever.  It would probably just be a bullpen start, and we all know it.

But again, the consensus seems to be that Kyle is fine, outside of headaches and having to pitch for the Philadelphia Phillies.