May 3, 2013; Philadelphia, PA, USA; Philadelphia Phillies second baseman Chase Utley (26) celebrates hitting a home run during the third inning against the Miami Marlins at Citizens Bank Park. Mandatory Credit: Howard Smith-USA TODAY Sports

Chase Utley, an MRI Machine and Freddy Galvis Walk Into a Bar...

Being old sucks, guys.

According to CSN Philly’s Jim Salisbury, Chase Utley will undergo an MRI on his sore rib cage, meaning he will not be in the lineup for the series finale against the Marlins tonight in Miami.

In case you’re a bit late to proceedings, Utley now joins Carlos Ruiz, Mike Adams and Ryan Howard as players who have needed a trip inside the MRI machine in the last few days, making the MRI machine a more popular Philadelphia attraction lately than The Franklin Institute.

I know we all said we wanted to get Freddy Galvis some more at bats, but I don’t think anyone wanted this.

Thanks, baseball.

Phils GM Ruben Amaro told Comcast Sportsnet this morning, “We’ll probably MRI him today or tomorrow, figure out how significant it is and go from there.”

I love that we’re now using MIR as a verb.

After last night’s game, Charlie Manuel said, “When he took a swing, he felt a little burn, a pain in his rib cage. Sometimes if you keep playing that can get more serious and you lose time. I’ve had those things. It’s hard to breathe, really hard to swing. We’ll see. Hopefully we don’t lose him for very long.”

Obviously, it completely sucks to lose your best offensive player for any length of time, and should it be required, a DL stint for Chase could not come at a worse time. Utley is the team leader in OPS (.814) and RBIs (25) and is second in HRs (7), and batting average (.272). The weak offense cannot afford to lose the one reliable bat they have.

I guess the good news is that his knees have not collapsed in on themselves like a couple of matchsticks holding up half a human. That’s all good. But ribcage/oblique strains are taken very seriously in Major League circles nowadays.

They’re all the rage, really.

Unfortunately, these are some of the consequences of age. As the body gets older, it breaks down a bit. Utley hurting himself during batting practice is like me straining my knee getting out of the shower. Or when I throw my back out sneezing. That kind of stuff happens as you get old.

If Utley does go on the disabled list, the Phils could recall Darin Ruf from AAA or Lehigh second baseman Cesar Hernandez, who is having an outstanding season for the Iron Pigs (.320/.386/.456, OPS .842, 2 HRs, 5 2Bs, 6 3Bs).

Stupid Father Time.

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