Roy Halladay Reportedly Alive After Visit to Weirdly-Named Doctor

After hours of speculation, we have our answer on Roy Halladay:

.  He has bone spurs in his shoulder, and a frayed labrum, and will be out for some time.  HOWEVER – he could very well return before the year is over.

Now, as we’ve already asked on these very pages, would we want that?  And the answer is, no one knows, it’s just nice to see Roy smile again.  And not only will his current problems be fixed, but the doctors Doc met with in Los Angeles have also apprently perfected time travel, which is kind of amazing.

"“Whenever he returns, though, Halladay said that doctors have told him they are confident they will have been able to ‘turn back the clock two or three years.””—David Murphy, Daily News"

May 8, 2013; San Francisco, CA, USA; Philadelphia Phillies pitcher Roy Halladay (34) talks to the media before the game against the San Francisco Giants at AT

Dr. Neal ElAttache, the doctor Roy met with, the name of whom keep getting weirder,  says tThe surgery will be as “uninvasive” as they can make it, by which they meant “noninvasive,” which is actually a word.

But still, they will most likely approach Roy in his natural habitat, hook him up to all that docotring machinery so delicately that he doesn’t even notice, and his cybernetic bones will be inserted before he even finished scowling at what he just learned is called “daytime television.”

With this being a contract year for Doc, the drama will only intensify as the year rolls on.  For now, it’s good to know that he is not gone forever and the possibility exists, however unlikely, that our wildest fantasies will come true.