The first of TBOH’s writers makes his ludicrous picks for 2013. Seriously, you’re gonna get so mad. So, so mad.
Justin Klugh (@TBOHblog)
Opening Day lineup, 2013
- Ben Revere
- Jimmy Rollins
- Chase Utley
- Ryan Howard
- Michael Young
- Domonic Brown
- John Mayberry
- Erik Kratz
- Cole Hamels
Opening Day MVP
Trade deadline deal
Ruben suddenly sees immense worth in Nate McLouth and trades, like, two minor league pitchers for him.
Unfortunate Twitter rumor of the year
Cliff Lee has been traded to the Diamondbacks for Jason Kubel
Place finished in division/playoffs (if applicable)
Stumble into second Wild Card spot, defeat the Giants in an immensely, borderline sexually, gratifying victory in San Fransicsco. Beaten 3-1 in the NLDS with the Dodgers.
NL East champs
Washington Nationals (106 wins)
NL Central champs
St. Louis Cardinals
NL West champs
Los Angeles Dodgers
NL Wild Cards
Philadelphia Phillies, San Francisco Giants (Phillies win)
NLCS teams and winner
AL East champs
AL Central champs
AL West champs
Los Angeles Angels
AL Wild Cards
Toronto Blue Jays, Cleveland Indians (Indians win)
ALCS teams and winner
World Series teams and winner
NL Cy Young
AL Cy Young
Most devastating injury of the year
Shane Victorino runs through a wall in Boston. When they look through the hole, there’s nothing but a cloud of dust. It smells like pineapples.
Biggest bust of the year (team)
Los Angeles Angels
Biggest bust of the year (player)
Most predictable finish
Phillies Opening Day lineup, 2018
- Mike Trout, CF
- Freddy Galvis, 2B
- Domonic Brown, RF
- Darin Ruf, 1B
- Tommy Joseph, C
- Ian Desmond, SS
- Josh Redick, LF
- Maikel Franco, 3B
- Jesse Biddle, P
Okay so with things like these, I know everybody gets mad, especially at people like me for not thoroughly researching deals and for generally just being a no-talent hack.
Mike Trout has enough of west coast flailing and underpaying from the Angels by 2018 and, free from his bonds, seeks the embrace of his hometown in Millvale, NJ, which many would describe as Citizens Bank Park-adjacent.
Freddy Galvis returns for another year after winning four Gold Gloves and several seasons of solid 280-.290 hitting. Dom Brown, now the elder statesman and team leader, leads the offensive salvo with a .320 average.
Darin Ruf is not a strong base-toucher, but takes over Ryan Howard’s vacated role with muscle-bound homer-blasting, but without the ludicrous contract. Tommy Joseph protects him and slips into the clean up role, along with Brown, when Ruf goes down once or twice with injuries.
Desmond is signed after the departure of Jimmy Rollins at the end of his three-year extension. His farewell is prolonged and tear-stained, as are all of the 2008 core infield’s. Desmond, an in-between year, seeks an exit from a plummeting Washington franchise and spends a year in Philly thinking about things.
Redick is signed to stabilize left field for the first time in six years. Franco surpassed Cody Asche as the organization’s top 3B prospect and transitioned nicely into the role, getting a few ROY nods.
Biddle inherits the hometown ace role and together with Trout start a popularized trend of players bringing championship banners to their real life native provinces.