Phillies Clinch First Place of Vegetarian Ballpark Food Options

There’s are lot of “Only in Philly” things.

• Swallowing batteries so we can throw them up later on Santa Claus.
• Cole Hamels’ career thus far.
• Those mysterious all-purpose meat cheesesteaks that were such abominations they were flushed down the toilet and became sentient, living abortions.

However, there’s something new in town that is also distinctly our’s.  No, it’s not a screeching, flesh eating sandwich.  This time.

With the team on the field not playing to expectations, or at all lately, we turn to concessions to eat our feelings.  For some people, those feelings don’t include things like meat or cheese, for some reason.  Our questions about that particular lifestyle aside, their dietary concerns must be accommodated.

Why?  Because this is Philadelphia, the City of Brotherly Love.  We need as many people as we can get to build our Army of Darkness.

So, it’s refreshing to have NPR pull back the curtain on the stadium food at Citizens Bank Park and reveal nothing but the most respected vegetarian food options in the country.  PETA is happy, ARAMARK is happy, and people who don’t have complete mental breakdowns of joy on Dollar Dog Night are happy.

It’s a glorious feeling, to win.  Once again, the Phillies are on top, showing the rest of the National League how it’s done.  Even fans from the dietarily liberal west coast have flocked here to satisfy what California couldn’t give them.

"Decked out in Dodgers gear, Amada Armenta waits in line at a concession stand.“I’m really excited that there’s a veggie dog, actually.”—Elizabeth Fiedler, NPR"

Is it the glory we imagined?  No.  But in a season starved of championship behavior, it’s obvious that we will turn just about anywhere to feed off sweet, sweet success.  So, let’s suck down a veggie dog or two in celebration of setting the bar once more.

Now where is the vegetarian bourbon.