The Phillies may not be winners, but the city of Philadelphia certainly is. Why, this week alone, we learned we were #1. Number one in what, you ask? You… really shouldn’t have asked.
Because it’s bed bugs. Yes, after years of New York taking the hallowed top spot on the list ranking our nation’s most heavily infested cities, Philly finally showed that big market behemoth how to be overrun with vermin that live in your bed. We managed to slip by Cincinnati and to be honest, it just feels good to be the best at something. Because it certainly wasn’t going to be a sport.
So anyway, Cole Hamels pitched imperfectly the other night, slipping his incoming payday down a bit, especially when you consider what his oft-compared rival was doing. But what are Cole’s motivations right now? The rotation is as much, or more, of a part of this decline as anybody. Does Cole have hope for this team? Is he looking forward to free agency? Will the Phillies trade him to avoid it?
No, no, no, says The Good Phight. In fact, just the opposite. And not only that, he’s a straight cold machine killer. As long as the bed bugs don’t get him.
The Phillies are playing bad enough to warrant talk of being sellers and it is getting too late not to think about it. That is truely depressing.
It seems like this whole Bryce Harper being good at baseball thing is working out for the Nationals. Apparently there is a direct correlation between the amount of eyeblack you wear and how good you are at stuff. Anyway, here is a video of Bryce sounding like a douche after a guy asks him about beer. It also illustrates that this guy can’t drink for another couple of years meaning that he is going to be a pain in the ass for a long time.
Topics: Phast Phive