John Bowker was our big name, late-August acquisition from the alley where he was trying to sell “used pizza.” Ruben Amaro saw the outfielder (?) as a chance to add depth to our left-handed strikeouts off the bench. And since joining the club, Bowker has come through in spades.
“Who even is John Bowker?” you ask, ignorantly. Well, I just told you. Yes, I’m going to pretend the joke-truth is the real truth in this post, instead of joking around at the beginning and then clearing things up with some smarmy-mouthed facts after the introductory paragraph. It’s that kind of morning. A joke-filled one.
Every so often, the camera will cut to that one Phillie leaning on the dugout fence that you don’t recognize. “Where are my favorites? Where are Doc and Cliff and Vance and Ross Gload? Why are they wasting precious screen time on this fan in an incredibly authentic Phillies jersey?”
That man is John Bowker, and if anything, you’re going to be seeing way more of him in the future.
No, I don’t mean he’s the guy that answered your Craigslist ad for a roommate. Unless he is. Which he might be. I don’t know how much success he’s had finding an apartment in this town. It can be a tad challenging at times.
“I want to see [Bowker] sometime, but we still want the home-field advantage.”
That’s Charlie, already assuming that putting Bowker in a game is the same thing as losing it. So as far as getting more playing time goes, that’s a pretty detrimental statement to some people’s chances. Mainly John Bowker. Only John Bowker.
Most of 2011 was spent in Indianapolis with the Pirates’ Triple-A affiliate, which I can relate to, having rotted in that organization for weeks in MLB 2K11: The Show. It’s no place to cultivate dreams.
Nevertheless, Charlie promises his “reports” are “good” on Bowker, so hopefully that translates into making the guy into more than an unrecognizable human ‘K.’