Archive for July, 2011

Jul 21st 2011

Starlin Castro and Darwin Barney Shouted at After Loss to Phillies

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: None Yet

They accepted the blame and promised to do better, rather than panicking, deciding that life on the lam and out of Sister Mary Patrick’s jurisdiction was worth the risk, and jumping out the first floor window.

Jul 21st 2011

Jimmy Rollins Mentioned in Same Breath as Steve Jeltz

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: None Yet

It seems that scoring four runs in the final two innings of last night’s comeback has sparked the Phillies offense. They got to the Cub hurlers for twelve hits and nine runs today. Jimmy Rollins hit a home run from each side of the plate accomplishing the feat for the first time since 2006.

Jul 20th 2011

NL East Infection: Read Before Your Daily Work Nap

AUTHOR: | IN: NL East Infection | COMMENTS: None Yet

The Mets aren’t even dealing with an irate Danny Glover painting their faces with spittle.

Jul 20th 2011

Phillies Confirm Every Single Trade Rumor You’ve Heard

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: None Yet

“Including Dumb Ones,” source says

Jul 20th 2011

Michael Martinez Gets a Game Winning Hit, Hell Begins to Freeze Over

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: 1 Comment

They scored two more runs in the ninth with a pair of singles from Ben Francisco and Jimmy Rollins with the game winning hit coming on another bloop hit from Michael Martinez. This is the second recent game in which Michael Martinez has been the offensive star. What the hell is going on?

Jul 19th 2011

Maybe Pretend to Care Joe Blanton Could be Out for the Season

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: 1 Comment

Oh, Doc had a little sweat problem last night. Joe Blanton is dead* and you don’t even bat an eyelid. Terrible.

Jul 18th 2011

Phillies Reveal Post All Star Game Strategy of Only Winning for Non Aces

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: None Yet

The only good thing to spring forth from this pile of excrement was that Roy Halladay was not injured, just hot. Aramis Ramirez and Carlos Pena hit home runs and everyone except Alfonzo Soriano contributed offensively.

Jul 18th 2011

Series 6-Pack: “This team is the Island of Misfit Toys”

AUTHOR: | IN: guest post | COMMENTS: None Yet

Mike Quade recently determined that in order for the Cubs to get better, the pitching will need to “improve.” How do you see this plan playing out?

Jul 18th 2011

Shane Victorino Finished Beating up Farmhands, Wants Job Back

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: None Yet

Why don’t you cram it, Mark Parent.

Jul 18th 2011

Don’t Let Philadelphia Turn Into Cleveland, Warns Journalist from the Future

AUTHOR: | IN: PHI Phillies | COMMENTS: None Yet

And what this all means is that filling column space on an off day is really sometimes a pain.

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