We Could Probably Leave Cliff Lee Alone Now

The Good Phight put up this video of Cliff arriving in town, tired and weary from his travels, and clearly anxious to have a smarm-faced local “reporter” stand in his way and thrust a microphone in his face while parasitic little autograph-hounds skittered about, swarming the guy like fire ants consuming a scorpion.

I’m not going to say I’m not excited.  If I see one more water stain on my basement walls that looks like Cliff, I’m calling a therapist.  And maybe a priest.  But I’m quarantining my crazy to myself, and also this blog, I guess.

What I’m saying is, its miraculous enough that he’s even back here, so don’t get all “WE ARE THE SPORTS MEDIA” on him and fire bazooka full of loaded questions directly into his face mere seconds after he gets here.  He’s a nice guy, so he won’t say anything, publically.  But in what is probably the only real difference between me and Cliff Lee, I will say publically that we should please get that camera the fuck out of his face.

Not that Cliff needs someone else to defend him.  I’m sure he’d start punching throats if it was deemed socially acceptable or if he didn’t have revolutionary levels of patience and class.

Its like stumbling upon two unicorns mating in the woods.  Just let ‘um go at it, let ‘um do what they’re inclined to do naturally, and then maybe ask a question or two afterward.  But don’t sprint towards them with a camera crew in mid coitus, screaming “HOW MUCH WOULD YOU SAY YOU MISSED PHILADELPHIA, A LOT OR MORE THAN A LOT?!”

There.  Now, I expect this all to stop.  If anything can bring local/national sports media to a grinding halt, its a 300-word post on a blog that nobody reads.

You’re welcome, Cliff.

Oh, and here’s an attempt to spin the Cliff Lee story into “Sixers news” somehow.  Didn’t work.

Tags: Cliff Lee Media News Philadelphia Phillies Unicorns

  • Phills_Phaithful@UConn

    That video made me cringe and laugh at the same time. Clearly an incredibly awkward few minutes for Clifford. I didn’t know you and Clifford were so alike that the only difference is you talk back to the media? Impressive. The Sixers thing on philly.com was pretty funny. Good way of getting someones attention. And whatta ya mean nobody reads this blog? I’ve recomended your article on finding out about the Lee trade to every phan I know (no guarantee they all read it though).

  • Phills_Phaithful@UConn

    What a failure, “on the Lee signing” would be correct-er.

    • http://thatballsouttahere.com Justin

      I didn’t want to say anything, so I’m glad you caught that mistake. And yeah, Cliff hired me years ago to be his human shield from media onslaughts. Its such a secret position that if you asked him about it, he would pretend to have no idea what in the hell you were talking about.

  • http://ingameasylum.blogspot.com Roger

    “…there seems to be too many cameras all aro-ound…”

    I could not resist this, I apologize.