I once worked as a fan photographer in Citizens Bank Park. This delightful career path involved an assignment to a specific part of the stadium after the fourth inning, where we would patrol, cameras in hand, desperately trying to reach our quota of pictures.
The only bonus was the huge opportunity to meet drunk girls. But Philadelphia is a big city in America, so… they were everywhere anyway.
One of these assigned sections were the rooftop bleachers. During night games, it was the first recipient of cold winds, and usually some parents trying to get their children to shut up. During day games, it fell victim to the genocidal sun and its attempts to scorch us all off the face of the earth, and usually some parents trying to get their kids to shut up.
And now you get to sit there!
Ticket prices are going–and don’t you just know what the next word is going to be–up in Citizens Bank Park. Yes, after 123 sellouts, the Phillies would like to thank you, and then get more of your money, because they want it, and let’s face it: You’re not going to stop going to Phillies games.
In most cases, the prices will be once again skyrocketing by anywhere from $2-5, but in some spots–like the rooftop bleachers–they’ll stay the same.
Come on. You hate your money. Paper cuts, the muscle pulls you get from making it rain at the club, all those creepy gazes from dead presidents trying to penetrate your soul. Any excuse to toss it away by the briefcase these days is totally worth it.
So let’s thank the Phils for doing us this solid.