Archive for August, 2010

But sooner or later, that’s just not going to be enough, and we will undoubtedly be storming the Utley Compound with pitchforks and torches, demanding the balls-deep second baseman with the cleats on his soul and the roguish smile play some baseball.

*We couldn’t stop them,* Charlie Manuel said, his eyes distant and glazed, like a doughnut perched sadly on the horizon.

With the Astros beating the Braves for some reason, the Phils are now a tiny little game out of first place in the NL East, a spot that only a month ago seemed as distant as Vicente Padilla’s stare.

“It was one of those pranks that make minor league baseball so exciting.”

Kyle Kendrick started the 2010 baseball season in a fight with a 47-year-old man.  No matter who it is, that’s got to weigh on the soul a bit.  And then to lose that fight, being a healthy 25-year-old guy, is probably a middle-aged, 74 mph slap in the face. But just as Jamie Moyer was saddling up to take the spot that was deservedly his, and Kyle walked dejectedly for the empty seat in the bullpen next to Brad Lidge (“Hey Kyle!  Hope I don’t blow it!”), a miracle happened.  Joe Blanton strained himself to left. So that was nice.

So if Roy “struggled” while picking up his 14th win–4th during this 14-3 run we’re on–then he “struggled” in the way that a grizzly bear “struggles” as it drags you screaming back to its cave.

Guys have been snatched in early August for the last few years who’ve graduated from places like Baltimore or Seattle, where the post season hides like a frightened child.

Chooch’s home run was timely and heroic, but so’s a fire engine, even if it shows up and the kittens have all burned to death.

As the Phils upgraded Howard’s status from “not dead” to “moderate ankle sprain,” Doc took the mound in his realm of perfectio

The Piazza, however, home to charming ‘lil shops and soothing evening tunes, is where all the cool kids hang out (I just discovered this fact–so they’ll probably pick a new spot within the next few weeks, I’ll keep you posted).