No, Opening Day Starter Will Not be Jamie Moyer

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“Moyer Unlikely For Opening Day,” said the headline.

“Does that even need to be said?” I replied, looking around the room for some accompanying laughs.  They didn’t come, so I added them myself for a few minutes.

But then I actually read the article, which is a pretty handy technique, by the way, because apparently you can be misled by just the headline, and saw what they really meant:  Jamie Moyer’s fourth surgery, this time on his right meniscus, is going to more than likely bar him from any Opening Day activities.

I would say any allegations of him filling that last spot on the rotation have all but evaporated.

WHO’S IT GONNA BE?!  WHO’S IT GONNA BE?!

Tell us, Phillies blogosphere over the next few weeks.  Kyle Kendrick?  Yeah probably.  But also probably Andrew Carpenter or this guy, Ryan Vogelsong, an ex-Pirate with a year in Japan under his belt and a pocket full of dreams. I’m considering this the least of our problems right now, as we have options to fill in the blanks, instead of other unfortunate clubs who have been left to scratch desperately at the walls, hoping some gold falls out.

If you were worried about Clay Condrey and how he was going to feed his children (and who wasn’t) then stop, because the dude will be playing professional baseball in 2010.  The Minnesota Twins snatched him up like he was a 6-2 relief pitcher with a 3.00 ERA.

… Oh.

Also, remember weeks ago when everything we were reading was about the Phillies prospective third baseman?  Those were the days.  Chone Figgins?  Mark DeRosa?  Placido Polanco?  It could’ve been anybody!  Ha, ha.  Wild.

Well, that one it could have been that I didn’t mention, Adrian Beltre, is now a Red So… ck.  Yeah.  A fantastic fielder, Beltre was cast aside in favor of what Pedro Feliz wasn’t giving us (either):  dependable offense.

And anywhere we travel this year, if at some point a ground ball slips past Placido, we’ll hear a soft whisper on the wind…

“… Beltre …”

God speed, Jamie.  And stay off that groin.